stories of a real life wonder woman

Something I have been hearing a lot lately is how good I look...and I have to say that feels dang good...though I know I look good it is good to hear as well...and I am glad that people see the difference from last year...for those of you who don't remember or weren't around...I was down 30 pounds last year this time and this girl doesn't have 30 pounds to lose...I was also having horrible headaches 24/7 (which we later found out was swelling on the brain that caused those seizures)...along with that I had zero strength...I would need a nap after doing simple things like climbing the stairs or taking a shower...and in general I just felt disgusting... What a change today is from last year...I can go the whole day without needing a nap (but why not nap anyway)...I feel pretty good most of the time...I am back to my normal weight...rarely have headaches...and obviously I look fly...praise Jesus for all of those...praise Jesus that I am still alive and able to spend time wit...

First things first...I haven't put a link to dad's caring bridge site in a while so here that is... http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/lewiefrye/journal Been talking to him on the phone once in a while and he seems to be in pretty good spirits so that's nice...and I think he likes having therapy to do so that he is not laying in bed doing nothing all day...he has a surgery scheduled for tomorrow to remove the last of the outside rods and pins in his right leg...at least I think that's what the surgery is for... I am also posting because I got to skype with Zachary Levi today...how insane is that...and you all probably know that I take pride in my hair and he thought it was fly...which can't lie was a big deal to me...though I do think it is a little bit of a mess since I played outside in the water with my nephews yesterday and haven't showered since then so it is sticking up weird in a few places...but I did get it cut at the beginning of the week since He...

I forgot to talk about my doctors appointment...so I should probably say that...not much happened or changed but I did get some good news...like the fact that my nutrition is good for the third month in a row...and my blood pressure is controlled finally...for the first time in a year since I started with Dr. Sader...so that good...he upped my shot amount...so that stinks...and I got super sick on Monday...slept pretty much all day...and I'm surprised I didn't throw up...so yeah... Also I don't know if I mentioned that this weekend we did a lot of reminiscing about His Oasis and Willie...even singing some of his songs...and Seth made sure he had a rough CD ready for MOP...he knew if he didn't Nicole and I would kill him...so that was fun that he did that for us... Now on to some other things I have been thinking about...like how much I love living in a small town...I know I have made fun of Dixon before that everyone is always in your business wither you like it or ...

So Friday on my anniversary (14 years post transplant/21 years since I first got sick) we did dialysis in the morning and the headed to Wisconsin for Mountain of Praise...that is mom Nicole and myself went to Wisconsin...first thing we did when we got to Wautoma was what we always do...go to Stoneridge and get cheese...also we looked around the store forever looking for a piggly wiggly shirt since it is one...no success... Then the rest of the day was pretty chill as we caught up with old friends and listened to music...my aunt did call my mom with some pretty exciting news and I did freak out...I am not going to deny that...but I am pretty chill now...it's a huge surprise and I am looking forward to it but I don't really want to overly talk about it or make a big deal out of it...even though I probably should...but if you want to know what cool thing is happening that could actually make me scream like a girl (since my friends know how much I hate that)...then message me or ...

That is the anniversary of my kidney transplant and the anniversary of when I first got sick...kind of crazy that they are on the same day...June 22nd 1991 I showed signs of a cold and some other things that lead to my kidney failure...that was 21 years ago...then June 22nd 1998 I had a kidney transplant receiving a kidney from my dad...that was 14 years ago...it's kind of crazy to think for...I want to celebrate it and I did a little today by buying myself some great presents...but I also feel a little weird celebrating it because my kidney is not really working...it's still been that many years since my first transplant though and that many years of being sick...so freaking many years of extra life...which is pretty amazing and it feels dang good to be alive... That might sound kind of weird but I can explain why I feel that way in one simple word... HOPE I have an unshakable hope in so many things...I have a hope that this craziness in my life isn't all for nothing...

I haven't really known how to answer that question recently when people have been asking me about my health...I don't necessarily feel bad but I don't feel good either...but that happens when your kidney doesn't work and you are on a transplant waiting list...your body does all these weird crappy things that hurt...I get these horrible pains at weird times in awkward places...like today in church during a prayer I got this horrible pain in my stomach area that was crampy but also like someone had punched me in the gut...it was bad...luckily we were praying so only my friends noticed me doubled over in pain...things like that though are just things I have to buck up and get used to because they aren't going away until I have a kidney that works... I can tell you this week I am super sick of dialysis and of getting stuck with needles...so that is a little depressing because that is my life for real right now so I can't do anything about that... On the positive...

So today turned into an adventure even though I didn't get up till like noon because I was so stinking tired...when I did finally get up I did normal stuck like go to KSB to get my blood drawn and run some errands... Then when mom came home we got stuff ready for dialysis...while we were getting that stuff ready Shelia came over with the boys...so we played with them a little bit and picked stuff from the garden for them to eat... Then we had to stop to get me hooked up to the machine...well mom put the needle it and it hurt a lot...and usually when she gets the needle in we have a lot of flash back...which means the line and the syringe fill with blood...that didn't happen today so we were worried and I told mom to take the needle out...but she forgot to take the tourniquet off...so then my blood shot out like crazy...and mom tried to use her hand to stop it...we did get it stop but their was a huge mess...blood all over my pants and moms pants and my rug...so we decided n...

I love the movie Tangled but we will get back to that... Something that has been a little weird to me is dad not being able to read my blogs...dad used to often be the first one to read my blog...like if I wouldn't get to it until late like midnight...that's when he was getting up at like 1 or 2 in the morning so he would read it first...or other times as I was sitting on the couch with my laptop and he would be sitting at his computer playing cards or creeping on people on facebook...and he would see that I closed my laptop or that I had posted my blog...and he would get on and read it right away...some times mom and he would even have a contest of who could read it first...now he has a bunch to catch up on...so that's a little weird for me... Now back to Tangled... I love that movie like a lot....I don't know if you have seen it or not but there is this whole thing with these flower/sun things...they look like this... When Rapunzel sees this sign (that is t...

And then I don't write anything...so today I thought maybe I would actually write something... Today ended up being a pretty relaxing day which was nice...I did my nails...and texted with my brother Cory...then talked on the phone to my brother Danny...and then my brother Evan came over to spend some time with me...man it feels good to have brothers... I've been thinking a little about how I can get defensive when it comes to the people I love...take for my brothers for example...people can say some bad things about them sometimes because they have done some dumb stuff...but I still love them and they are still my brothers so when I hear people talk crap about them I want to hit them... Now its not always that extreme but lately I have been getting really defensive as well...like when people say things about my dad...even if it is something good I sort of want to be like "you don't know him"...I think that is because I am so on edge about all of this though....

But then I went to the movies and completely forgot about it till today... I don't know for sure what to say because I have been feeling like a mess of emotions lately...not that the rest of my family hasn't but I can only speak for me...I told my best friend though that this is one of those times when I want a punching bag because I need some how to get my anger and frustration out...I don't know I want to cry and scream and whatever but mainly I just want all this hard stuff to be over with but I don't really see that happening anytime soon... My health is ok...my blood pressures have been a little crazy but that could be because of all that is going on...and yesterday after dialysis was not good because I felt really sick...we think I took off to much... Dad is slowly doing better...I guess he is mouthing words and stuff now...which is good but that also means all the healing time and stuff is really happening now and that is sort of scary to me...it just seems...