I heard this quote one time

From a person that was in the twin towers when they were hit on 9-11...he escaped the tower and made it into a nearby building soon after the second tower fell...the was sitting on the floor shaking and a medic came up to him and said he was experiencing post tramtic stress...and he looked up at her and said "aren't I still in the tramtic situation?"...thats how I feel...I'm still in the middle of the bad dream that I can shake off or change...

Last night I was having a hard time falling asleep so I wrote down my thoughts...this is what they were...

Here's the problem...I don't want dad to be in pain and I want him to be able to do all the things he did before like work on his truck...mow the lawn...take care of the garden...cause he loves to do that...he's a farmer at heart...but with his leg injuries that might be a while yet...so if he's ok he will get depressed and might lose a leg which makes those things even harder...so that leaves me stuck because to me logically and from knowing how it feels to be jacked up laying in a bed I would say I just wanna go home to Heaven...and so daddy doens't have to deal with all of this that makes sense...
But I want him to be wrong about dying young...and I don't want him to die in a motorcycle accident...and I want him to be around for a lot of things still...like to teach Cassie how to fillet a fish...or see Matthew ride his bike without training wheels or play t-ball...or be there when I have my next transplant...
He's my dad and I love him so I want what's best for him but he's my dad and I love him so I want what I selfishly think is best for me


I forgot to post this the otherday but here is the link to the site mom has been trying to update to tell people what is going on...
  http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/lewiefrye


Thanks for all your support...keep it coming

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