Most of the week I have done nothing
So I am not sure what to write about...but as per usual I will give an update of health stuff since it seems lately I have a doctor's appointment or a test or something else health related every week...
This week I had an upper GI scope on Tuesday...my hemoglobin that day was 6.6 so they had to give me 2 units of blood...they wanted to get one in before my procedure so that put it back a little bit...for those of you that don't know it usually takes 2 hours to cross and type match you for blood so you spend a lot of time sitting around waiting...with that being said my scope which was planned for 12:15 ended up happening at closer to 2...they put the first unit of blood in my body in an hour and then I had the scope and then got the second unit in about two hours...that's pretty normal it just ended up being a long day since I got into the hospital that morning at about 10:30 then didn't leave till about 6...and we still had to do dialysis after that...as for the scope they didn't find an ulcer at all...which baffled Kathy the dialysis nurse that I call and work with because I guess blood is still showing up in my stool a little...they did find what they called a mass or a polyp...now don't freak out about it...they made it sound like it was no big deal...they did take a biopsy of it to get a better idea of what it is but they really made it out to be something that shouldn't be worried about...they say something people get some stomach pain with them but I haven't had that so that makes it even less of a problem...I will tell you though they should us pictures of it and it looked weird...
Tomorrow I have a blood test and I see my surgeon about my fistula...I am kind of nervous about the appointment...I keep having these dreams where my fistula doesn't work or it hasn't grown enough and we have to do another surgery to try again and I have to keep this perm cath in longer that I hate so freakin much...sometimes when I think about the possibility of it not working it makes me want to cry and give up...but as my mom says that would be a long very very slow painful death if I didn't continue to deal with the things in my life now...getting the surgeries for dialysis and taking handfuls of meds...and seeing doctors for a million and one different things...its gets tiring all the time but I really have no other choice at all...so everyday I choose to rough it through this crazy life of mine...
This week I haven't done much...I did finish two classes so I am that much closer to being done with school...I have another class to take that starts this week...it's a 100 level class and I have been taking 400 level classes so it should be a breeze...I also have a class I end to take for my degree still that is offered only in the summer as and online class...that won't hinder me from graduating in May since you can have up to 12 credits that you still have to take in the summer and still graduate...anywho its exciting that I finished two more classes since they were harder and I still have been in and out of the hospital for tests and surgeries and what not...most of the week though I spent chillin doing nothing much...I watched some movies and caught up on some TV shows that I like and I read a little for fun...and I slept a lot...so that was really nice to take some time to do nothing...
I don't really know what else to say this week...sometimes after so much going on with me health wise and and having to deal with doctors and hospitals and meds and ordering tons of stuff for dialysis I feel like my brain turns to mush...its so much to take in and to deal with all the time that I do often want a break and find myself zoning out and wanting to check out...since I can't really stop my life or get away from the mess I instead check out the way I know how too...by letting my mind mush up a little and not thinking too hard...letting myself be lazy and sleep all the time and enjoy what little things I can...like movies or books or music and time that I do have with family and friends...though I am not encouraging you to check out like I sometimes do since it's probably not the best way of coping with all of this I do encourage you to take joy in everything that happens and think about all the things that you are blessed to have...
This week I had an upper GI scope on Tuesday...my hemoglobin that day was 6.6 so they had to give me 2 units of blood...they wanted to get one in before my procedure so that put it back a little bit...for those of you that don't know it usually takes 2 hours to cross and type match you for blood so you spend a lot of time sitting around waiting...with that being said my scope which was planned for 12:15 ended up happening at closer to 2...they put the first unit of blood in my body in an hour and then I had the scope and then got the second unit in about two hours...that's pretty normal it just ended up being a long day since I got into the hospital that morning at about 10:30 then didn't leave till about 6...and we still had to do dialysis after that...as for the scope they didn't find an ulcer at all...which baffled Kathy the dialysis nurse that I call and work with because I guess blood is still showing up in my stool a little...they did find what they called a mass or a polyp...now don't freak out about it...they made it sound like it was no big deal...they did take a biopsy of it to get a better idea of what it is but they really made it out to be something that shouldn't be worried about...they say something people get some stomach pain with them but I haven't had that so that makes it even less of a problem...I will tell you though they should us pictures of it and it looked weird...
Tomorrow I have a blood test and I see my surgeon about my fistula...I am kind of nervous about the appointment...I keep having these dreams where my fistula doesn't work or it hasn't grown enough and we have to do another surgery to try again and I have to keep this perm cath in longer that I hate so freakin much...sometimes when I think about the possibility of it not working it makes me want to cry and give up...but as my mom says that would be a long very very slow painful death if I didn't continue to deal with the things in my life now...getting the surgeries for dialysis and taking handfuls of meds...and seeing doctors for a million and one different things...its gets tiring all the time but I really have no other choice at all...so everyday I choose to rough it through this crazy life of mine...
This week I haven't done much...I did finish two classes so I am that much closer to being done with school...I have another class to take that starts this week...it's a 100 level class and I have been taking 400 level classes so it should be a breeze...I also have a class I end to take for my degree still that is offered only in the summer as and online class...that won't hinder me from graduating in May since you can have up to 12 credits that you still have to take in the summer and still graduate...anywho its exciting that I finished two more classes since they were harder and I still have been in and out of the hospital for tests and surgeries and what not...most of the week though I spent chillin doing nothing much...I watched some movies and caught up on some TV shows that I like and I read a little for fun...and I slept a lot...so that was really nice to take some time to do nothing...
I don't really know what else to say this week...sometimes after so much going on with me health wise and and having to deal with doctors and hospitals and meds and ordering tons of stuff for dialysis I feel like my brain turns to mush...its so much to take in and to deal with all the time that I do often want a break and find myself zoning out and wanting to check out...since I can't really stop my life or get away from the mess I instead check out the way I know how too...by letting my mind mush up a little and not thinking too hard...letting myself be lazy and sleep all the time and enjoy what little things I can...like movies or books or music and time that I do have with family and friends...though I am not encouraging you to check out like I sometimes do since it's probably not the best way of coping with all of this I do encourage you to take joy in everything that happens and think about all the things that you are blessed to have...
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