Tough Week
Oh man I don't even know what to report.
As per usual this week has me worn out. I have sent most of today in bed and I slept in late yesterday as well. I like feeling like I am working hard but I don't like how it wears me out. I know I am sick and that's why I get worn out so quickly but sometimes it still sucks that my young body acts like an old body because everything it has been through. That is still a tough pill to swallow sometimes.
This week also has me worn out because I made the trip back and forth from mom and dad's house in one day. My aunt and my cousin's baby were in town so I took a half day off work to see them. We had a family dinner at one of our favorite restaurants. Now don't get me wrong I love my family. I would not be who I am without them. But sometimes when we are together it can get a little overwhelming for me. Because we are all loud, talking over each other and wanting attention. Sometimes that is more than I can handle. Since I was already a bit on edge from having to drive through construction being around them was good but a bit much. Don't get me wrong I can be loud and obnoxious like everyone else but when I am used to my weeks being much more quite - it's a little overpowering.
Then there are the other usually things making me worn out - battling my body. I have been feeling dizzy and light headed on and off all week. Sometimes I get home at night and think I can barely stay standing how did I make it through a full day of work. And then even though I am that tired I still can't sleep. I cannot even begin to tell you frustrating that is. Sometimes the same things that make it so that I am worn out are the very things that keep me from sleeping. For example sometimes feeling dizzy translates to feeling like you are on a boat when you lay down. That rough water rocking feeling does not ever make me feel like I can sleep. Other times because all of this is normally side effects of my meds I end up having horrible nightmares - also a med side effect. The kind that wake you up in a panic and make you not want to sleep for days but then you have to fight your own mind to coax yourself back to sleep.
Kind of a depressing post this week but it is also some of the realities of my life that don't go away even when I don't post about them.
As per usual this week has me worn out. I have sent most of today in bed and I slept in late yesterday as well. I like feeling like I am working hard but I don't like how it wears me out. I know I am sick and that's why I get worn out so quickly but sometimes it still sucks that my young body acts like an old body because everything it has been through. That is still a tough pill to swallow sometimes.
This week also has me worn out because I made the trip back and forth from mom and dad's house in one day. My aunt and my cousin's baby were in town so I took a half day off work to see them. We had a family dinner at one of our favorite restaurants. Now don't get me wrong I love my family. I would not be who I am without them. But sometimes when we are together it can get a little overwhelming for me. Because we are all loud, talking over each other and wanting attention. Sometimes that is more than I can handle. Since I was already a bit on edge from having to drive through construction being around them was good but a bit much. Don't get me wrong I can be loud and obnoxious like everyone else but when I am used to my weeks being much more quite - it's a little overpowering.
Then there are the other usually things making me worn out - battling my body. I have been feeling dizzy and light headed on and off all week. Sometimes I get home at night and think I can barely stay standing how did I make it through a full day of work. And then even though I am that tired I still can't sleep. I cannot even begin to tell you frustrating that is. Sometimes the same things that make it so that I am worn out are the very things that keep me from sleeping. For example sometimes feeling dizzy translates to feeling like you are on a boat when you lay down. That rough water rocking feeling does not ever make me feel like I can sleep. Other times because all of this is normally side effects of my meds I end up having horrible nightmares - also a med side effect. The kind that wake you up in a panic and make you not want to sleep for days but then you have to fight your own mind to coax yourself back to sleep.
Kind of a depressing post this week but it is also some of the realities of my life that don't go away even when I don't post about them.
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