Frustrations and Reminders in Playlists

So a few months back I created a playlist I titled 'Buds.' This playlist is just all the Switchfoot and Relient K albums on my ipod. I gotta tell you so far this playlist has been one of my best ideas. Both bands write songs that are filled with reminders about forgiveness and mercy and grace and hope and love. And sometimes those reminders hit me like a ton of bricks.

The other day I was playing this playlist on shuffle as I am prone to do and the songs "The Day that I found God" and "Hello Hurricane" both by Switchfoot played back to back. The truths and reminders to my soul hit me so hard I went back and played both songs again.

Now it might start to seem like this all doesn't tie together but hang it there with me.

This week was the first week with students back. It was the first of two changes that my hours will make this semester. The second comes Monday. Short explanation we didn't fill the position of the lady that retired and so we have had to cut back our hours. But since it was the first week back we wanted to be open later in case of questions. Since I am the one who keeps the library open later obviously my hours have been changing as we have been changing how late we will be open.

I would like to say it was a good first week with the students back for me but it was not. Instead it was a week filled with a lot of frustrations. Some of them old frustrations rearing their head again to the point of feeling like maybe I made the wrong choice of a profession.

And then I read something about how if you ever feel like "why am I do this?" about what you love to do that's normal. And it can mean that you are in the right field because in a way it reminds you how much you care about what you are doing. That helped me calm down (as did the leftover shingles like nerve pain shooting up my leg the next day from overly stressing about things).

For me it wasn't so much of a "oh then I must be in the right field because I am ready to give up" type of thing but a "it's so nice to know I am not alone" type of thing. It is always such a relief when you know that you are not the only one of feels like giving up on something you love. A relief to know that your struggles at work are not unique.

And then these songs came barrelling back into my heart and mind -

For me these songs this week were a reminder that I have faced worse things in life and to yet again reset my focus because I will face more in life.

But with God I am ready for any storm that comes my way.