Anniversaries
Hi all,
So I was grouchy Sunday and thought "I can post tomorrow night." But then last night I forgot. I actually didn't remember until this morning on my way to work. Ha - oops.
Spent the weekend and part of the week with my fam. And during the week I got to see a dear friend who currently lives out of the state. Seeing her even for brief periods of time are encouraging and balm for my often tired soul.
Today I am feeling unsure of what to write.
Yesterday marked four years since my second transplant. Four years with Alex keeping me alive.
Thursday will mark 26 years since I first got sick and 19 years since my first transplant.
These days often feel bittersweet. I am glad to be alive but I am acutely aware of not only the loss of Alex's life but the loss of a healthy life for me.
I have never known a day without medications.
I have never known a day when my body wasn't a huge mess that I am fighting against.
Don't get me wrong I am most days glad to still be here but just like with any fight - it gets old, I get tired, and I want a break.
But that won't happen until I meet Jesus face to face.
So instead I fight for the good. I fight to see the positives in everyday - the reasons to be happy I am here on Earth.
I believe that going home to heaven will be the most unbelievably good experience but I also believe only God can tell me when that time has come. Until then I will continue to do my best to learn and grow and see why it is that God still has me here.
To celebrate the victories that come with living in a broken body on this fallen world.
So I was grouchy Sunday and thought "I can post tomorrow night." But then last night I forgot. I actually didn't remember until this morning on my way to work. Ha - oops.
Spent the weekend and part of the week with my fam. And during the week I got to see a dear friend who currently lives out of the state. Seeing her even for brief periods of time are encouraging and balm for my often tired soul.
Today I am feeling unsure of what to write.
Yesterday marked four years since my second transplant. Four years with Alex keeping me alive.
Thursday will mark 26 years since I first got sick and 19 years since my first transplant.
These days often feel bittersweet. I am glad to be alive but I am acutely aware of not only the loss of Alex's life but the loss of a healthy life for me.
I have never known a day without medications.
I have never known a day when my body wasn't a huge mess that I am fighting against.
Don't get me wrong I am most days glad to still be here but just like with any fight - it gets old, I get tired, and I want a break.
But that won't happen until I meet Jesus face to face.
So instead I fight for the good. I fight to see the positives in everyday - the reasons to be happy I am here on Earth.
I believe that going home to heaven will be the most unbelievably good experience but I also believe only God can tell me when that time has come. Until then I will continue to do my best to learn and grow and see why it is that God still has me here.
To celebrate the victories that come with living in a broken body on this fallen world.
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