Mid Week Post
So a few things...
I have been having some pain again recently...my doctor and nurses don't really seem to be concerned about it...I keep thinking of all the bad things it could be...and I need to take a chill pill...the pain tends to come when I have been putting to much pressure on the incision area...like after long car rides...or when I wake up in the middle of the night laying on that side...not good...sometimes too if I move too quickly there's a pulling feeling that is uncomfortable...it's been five weeks since transplant which is a long time...and yet isn't...like I can start doing more stuff...riding my bike...heading back to work soon...but I still have to be careful about some things...like when I am playing with my nephews because they get a little crazy...
I have been doing more lately though...went for a bike ride on the bike trail with my mom the other day...we rode on the trail for three miles...and we rode up to the trail...felt good at the time but my legs hurt like crazy later...and I have been playing with my nephews a little...still not picking them up because that might still be a bad idea...luckily they like it when I don't pick them up...turd ferguson (Jeremiah the younger of the two) probably loves that I haven't been able to pick him up and carry him around...and I think starting on Monday I am going to try to go back into work for a little bit...I can be around animals again so that's good...and my boss's dogs are super chill so that helps...I don't have to worry about them jumping on me or anything...
Even though I've been sort of sick recently (what I mean by that is that I am on my period and I was in a state yesterday where I wanted to throw up sleep and poop all at the same time...basically I felt like I was dying...I only say this because I know people will be like "what do you mean sick" "shouldn't you call your doctor"...about my period?...no)...which is no fun while recovering...it's like a double whammy...blech...anywho even with that I have been going a little stir crazy...I just want to get out of the house and do something fun...but I don't really know what...my friends are working so doing stuff with them is out...I've sort of been thinking of going to the zoo in Chicago because it's bigger than the Peoria zoo...but I don't like driving into Chicago...pain in the rear...and it's been a bit to hot for the zoo...but I need ideas of things that I could do to get me out of the house having some fun...I mean sitting around reading is fun...but I want to enjoy other things in life too...
One more random thing from the week so far...with the pain and the not feeling very good and the being bored comes moodiness...so if I have been a jerk to you recently I really am sorry...I feel like I don't know how to talk to people right now...and I am even more awkward than normally...I feel like as per usual people just want to hear good news and expect good news even more now because I have a new kidney...but I still have bad days and I still really am sick even with a new kidney...my life is still a life of doctors appointments and meds...that stuff will never go away...and even with a perfect match kidney those things still suck sometimes...I was also telling mom I feel like I have a middle case of post traumatic stress disorder because I was so worried and stressed and on edge for so long it's like my body and my brain don't know what to do right now...I find myself crying or wanting to cry about the dumbest things...I can't seem to take a chill pill at all some days...if you catch me at one of those times I am sorry...sometimes I still feels unreal all that has happened recently...I don't know what to do with myself...which seems to be common for me...which as stated makes me moody...but I will try my best to be kind...bare with me...I'm still learning...
I have been having some pain again recently...my doctor and nurses don't really seem to be concerned about it...I keep thinking of all the bad things it could be...and I need to take a chill pill...the pain tends to come when I have been putting to much pressure on the incision area...like after long car rides...or when I wake up in the middle of the night laying on that side...not good...sometimes too if I move too quickly there's a pulling feeling that is uncomfortable...it's been five weeks since transplant which is a long time...and yet isn't...like I can start doing more stuff...riding my bike...heading back to work soon...but I still have to be careful about some things...like when I am playing with my nephews because they get a little crazy...
I have been doing more lately though...went for a bike ride on the bike trail with my mom the other day...we rode on the trail for three miles...and we rode up to the trail...felt good at the time but my legs hurt like crazy later...and I have been playing with my nephews a little...still not picking them up because that might still be a bad idea...luckily they like it when I don't pick them up...turd ferguson (Jeremiah the younger of the two) probably loves that I haven't been able to pick him up and carry him around...and I think starting on Monday I am going to try to go back into work for a little bit...I can be around animals again so that's good...and my boss's dogs are super chill so that helps...I don't have to worry about them jumping on me or anything...
Even though I've been sort of sick recently (what I mean by that is that I am on my period and I was in a state yesterday where I wanted to throw up sleep and poop all at the same time...basically I felt like I was dying...I only say this because I know people will be like "what do you mean sick" "shouldn't you call your doctor"...about my period?...no)...which is no fun while recovering...it's like a double whammy...blech...anywho even with that I have been going a little stir crazy...I just want to get out of the house and do something fun...but I don't really know what...my friends are working so doing stuff with them is out...I've sort of been thinking of going to the zoo in Chicago because it's bigger than the Peoria zoo...but I don't like driving into Chicago...pain in the rear...and it's been a bit to hot for the zoo...but I need ideas of things that I could do to get me out of the house having some fun...I mean sitting around reading is fun...but I want to enjoy other things in life too...
One more random thing from the week so far...with the pain and the not feeling very good and the being bored comes moodiness...so if I have been a jerk to you recently I really am sorry...I feel like I don't know how to talk to people right now...and I am even more awkward than normally...I feel like as per usual people just want to hear good news and expect good news even more now because I have a new kidney...but I still have bad days and I still really am sick even with a new kidney...my life is still a life of doctors appointments and meds...that stuff will never go away...and even with a perfect match kidney those things still suck sometimes...I was also telling mom I feel like I have a middle case of post traumatic stress disorder because I was so worried and stressed and on edge for so long it's like my body and my brain don't know what to do right now...I find myself crying or wanting to cry about the dumbest things...I can't seem to take a chill pill at all some days...if you catch me at one of those times I am sorry...sometimes I still feels unreal all that has happened recently...I don't know what to do with myself...which seems to be common for me...which as stated makes me moody...but I will try my best to be kind...bare with me...I'm still learning...
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