Great Escape

So sometimes after I post something depressing...or when I sound fed up with my jacked up body people seem to think that means I am going to give up...

I don't know how many times I have to clarify this but I don't have a choice in when I will be done fighting...I can't just "give up"...kidney failure doesn't really work that way...nor do I believe that life works that way either...so stop freaking out...get your panties out of a bind...

The way I look it my situation would be the same as the way Robin Roberts recently described her fight to People Magazine..."People say to me, 'You're so strong.' What was I supposed to do? I want to live."...she also said something else that I too feel..."I want to give people hope. I want to let them know there is another day. I can be fearful or fearless. I choose to be fearless."...anytime I complain or get frustrated with where my life is right now...you need to know that after all of that...no matter how bad of a day I have...I end the day knowing that there are better days to come...and that I hope in Christ...those are the words that sometimes go unspoken...so if you miss anything else I say...don't miss out on this...life is so much bigger and greater than my bad days...and my God who I hope in is too...

Also sometimes I just need to vent...and my blog is a good place to do that...it feels safe and ok to say the things that I think but know I probably shouldn't say in public...it's a place where I can say things aren't the best right now...and not get some cliche advice that I already know...like "God will provide" or "God's got a plan."...guess what...I already know that...this isn't my first time riding the sick train...or feeling a bit depressed about my life...

It's like this song P!nk sings (I know I reference her or her songs a lot but have you seen her or heard her voice...hello she's a fresh babe)...in her song "The Great Escape"...the last verse goes like this...
"I'm the king of the great escape
You're not gonna watch me checkin outta this place
You're not gonna lose me
Cause the passion and pain
Are gonna keep us alive, someday"
Hear those words from me...and let that be a reminder that as far as it comes to my end of the deal I will run the race to it's completion and never check out before it is my time...

Here's a video with the lyrics if you want to watch it...


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