Just some random thoughts
This probably will be really random...just so you know ahead of time...
I have been thinking a lot about my birthday that is coming up...I am kind of excited...which is sort of new for me...I don't usually get excited about my birthday...I guess I always just figure very one has a birthday so what's so special about celebrating it...but it is really a celebration of you...which could also be why I don't always like birthdays because I don't always like the attention...but I feel like I am still learning that it is ok to make things about me sometimes...this year I think maybe I am looking forward to my birthday because of all that has happened in my life in the past year...the blood transfusion...the whole almost dying twice thing...being put on a transplant list...then put on hold on the transplant list because of the previously mentioned blood transfusions...then being put as active on the transplant list again...or all these other things not related to my health...like dad's accident and him a lot dying and then losing a foot...or graduating...or my brother Lance getting married...it seems like lifetimes have passed since my last birthday even though it has only been a year...but as I have celebrated so many other things this year I want to celebrate my birthday and really just celebrate...and it might be nice to be reminded how many people love me...so maybe I should have you guys do like I did for my graduation...wear purple...my favorite color...on my birthday...it is still a few days off since it on the 19th on this month...but I do think it would be super cool if my friends and family did that again...I loved it so much last time...I'm pretty sure I will love it again...
Besides that I have been putting in a lot of hours at the library...and well I still love it...today I learned some new things...like how to enter our new books into the system...so I am planning to go in for a little bit tomorrow to enter those...I just really like it...I like helping Lee Ann and working with her...I like trying to help the kids with stuff...encouraging them to read and what not...I was thinking today to how I am just a little bit OCD...just maybe...ok I am big time...and how that's one of the things I love about the library that there is a set order for everything and everything has a place...I love that so much...
I have been looking into U of I online program for Masters in Library Science more too...gosh I am so nervous about it...there is so much information to read and I want to read it all or most of it before I call in because I don't want to ask them something and then have them be like "It's on the website"...on top of that I have never really applied to a school before...I didn't really have to apply to Sauk because I was a Sauk scholar so they took me...and then I don't remember applying to GCU...I just remember calling them and then them being all like "yeah we will take you and your money"...so the whole application process is sort of new to me...but since I have all these hours already and I obviously want to be there I think that will make the acceptance part of it easier...plus I am an English Lit major who wrote a ton of papers...which means the paper writing part of the application should be a piece of cake...but I am still nervous...and I am building up my courage to talk to someone on the phone...my goal right now is to read as much of the information on the website that I can this weekend and then call in on Monday with my questions and just in general to talk to someone...
Part of me right now though is still just wanting to celebrate that I did graduate and not stress so much about applying...I mean it is a big freakin deal that I graduated on time while almost dying for real during the process...and I want to linger in that good feeling of having done something incredible first before rushing onto the next thing...I want to be recognized for what I did...but at the same time I want to get on with this masters program so I can get on with my life...and so that some of the things I know how to do for school are still fresh in my mind...
I think maybe another part of the reason why I am apprehensive about this is that I don't want to start it and then have to put things on hold or have to stop because of a transplant or because I am sick...but I don't want to put it off and wait until after that either...cause who knows when I am going to get a kidney...so if I end up doing homework in the hospital again don't make fun of me too much...I can't help it...I like to get things done all at once...
Pray that my fears about the future would be put to rest...and that I would know what to say on the phone when I call the admissions office since I think I am super awkward on the phone...
I have been thinking a lot about my birthday that is coming up...I am kind of excited...which is sort of new for me...I don't usually get excited about my birthday...I guess I always just figure very one has a birthday so what's so special about celebrating it...but it is really a celebration of you...which could also be why I don't always like birthdays because I don't always like the attention...but I feel like I am still learning that it is ok to make things about me sometimes...this year I think maybe I am looking forward to my birthday because of all that has happened in my life in the past year...the blood transfusion...the whole almost dying twice thing...being put on a transplant list...then put on hold on the transplant list because of the previously mentioned blood transfusions...then being put as active on the transplant list again...or all these other things not related to my health...like dad's accident and him a lot dying and then losing a foot...or graduating...or my brother Lance getting married...it seems like lifetimes have passed since my last birthday even though it has only been a year...but as I have celebrated so many other things this year I want to celebrate my birthday and really just celebrate...and it might be nice to be reminded how many people love me...so maybe I should have you guys do like I did for my graduation...wear purple...my favorite color...on my birthday...it is still a few days off since it on the 19th on this month...but I do think it would be super cool if my friends and family did that again...I loved it so much last time...I'm pretty sure I will love it again...
Besides that I have been putting in a lot of hours at the library...and well I still love it...today I learned some new things...like how to enter our new books into the system...so I am planning to go in for a little bit tomorrow to enter those...I just really like it...I like helping Lee Ann and working with her...I like trying to help the kids with stuff...encouraging them to read and what not...I was thinking today to how I am just a little bit OCD...just maybe...ok I am big time...and how that's one of the things I love about the library that there is a set order for everything and everything has a place...I love that so much...
I have been looking into U of I online program for Masters in Library Science more too...gosh I am so nervous about it...there is so much information to read and I want to read it all or most of it before I call in because I don't want to ask them something and then have them be like "It's on the website"...on top of that I have never really applied to a school before...I didn't really have to apply to Sauk because I was a Sauk scholar so they took me...and then I don't remember applying to GCU...I just remember calling them and then them being all like "yeah we will take you and your money"...so the whole application process is sort of new to me...but since I have all these hours already and I obviously want to be there I think that will make the acceptance part of it easier...plus I am an English Lit major who wrote a ton of papers...which means the paper writing part of the application should be a piece of cake...but I am still nervous...and I am building up my courage to talk to someone on the phone...my goal right now is to read as much of the information on the website that I can this weekend and then call in on Monday with my questions and just in general to talk to someone...
Part of me right now though is still just wanting to celebrate that I did graduate and not stress so much about applying...I mean it is a big freakin deal that I graduated on time while almost dying for real during the process...and I want to linger in that good feeling of having done something incredible first before rushing onto the next thing...I want to be recognized for what I did...but at the same time I want to get on with this masters program so I can get on with my life...and so that some of the things I know how to do for school are still fresh in my mind...
I think maybe another part of the reason why I am apprehensive about this is that I don't want to start it and then have to put things on hold or have to stop because of a transplant or because I am sick...but I don't want to put it off and wait until after that either...cause who knows when I am going to get a kidney...so if I end up doing homework in the hospital again don't make fun of me too much...I can't help it...I like to get things done all at once...
Pray that my fears about the future would be put to rest...and that I would know what to say on the phone when I call the admissions office since I think I am super awkward on the phone...
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