Cool?
I keep hearing how I am part of these groups and that we are the so called "cool kids"...just to clear everything up...I don't try to exclude anyone nor do I try to be overly cool...I just do what I want and if that makes me cool then ok...
Also know that if I am not talking to you it's most likely not because I don't like you...it's more because I am a lot more shy than people think I am...so many people seem to think I am this great people person...but I'm not...I feel like I never know what to say to people...so I just let them talk...and I am not usually the type of person to introduce myself to someone new...I get really uncomfortable with that...
I know that sometimes on here I sound like I am great with words and shouldn't have a problem talking to anyone...but with my computer I can pretend I am typing up something that no one will ever read...and I don't have to see anyone's first reactions...I don't actually have to do any human interaction...and I have time to think about what I am going to say...and I do take my time...and use the delete button a lot...I like that...you can't really do that in a conversation...
Also I guess I don't really notice that I am part of any cool group or often that others think I am cool if they do...I think I am cool but I don't expect other people to think the same...cause I'm a bit quirky...and I can be a major jerk...and I can be super blunt...and I tend to make non-awkward situations awkward...it's one of my super powers...but I still like me...flaws and all...and I think that's what matters...that I like me and that Jesus looks at me and is like, "I did a good job on that one. She's who I made her to be."...I mean really I do what I want 99.9% of the time and don't really think at all about how other people will view me...that may be an exaggeration...I do think about what my friends think to a point...but you get what I'm saying...so when I hear through a friend or relative or even in person that people think I am cool...I'm kind of taken a back...
But it does sort of feel good to have other people think you are cool...but even if they didn't I would still be me...I guess you could say I'm self-assured...I know who and I am whose I am...and that's what matters...the rest is sprinkles on the cupcake (I could say icing on the cake but I don't really like icing...but I love sprinkles....and I don't really want my own whole cake...that's to much for me to eat...it will go bad before I can enjoy it...and yes I know it's not a real cake but I'm just being honest about who I am)...
Sure I still have days when I hate the way my hair looks (like right now...girl needs a haircut)...or days when I feel like I can't do anything right...but I figure it's just one day...not my whole life...my hair is going to look different tomorrow...and my mood is going to be different tomorrow helping me to see all the things I am good at...I don't let the every now and then bad days dictate my life...
Even with the bad days I often wish I could teach others how to be self-assured...self-confidant...but I'm not really sure how to do that...I think it would help if I had a better idea of how I became this way...but just saying that I had to realize these things at a young age since death is always trying to get me to join him on date doesn't really help anyone else...and I often find that just spouting Bible verses at people doesn't work either...I can say that "we are fearfully and wonderfully made" or that "we were knit together in our mothers wombs" but that doesn't always connect with people...
I do know that it helps to surround yourself with positive people who will bring you up and not put you down...and who will do the same for themselves...I read one time that girls tend to get this really bad group mentality where they all bash themselves...we've all seen it happen too...one girl says she hates her legs and then another says she needs a flatter stomach cause she fat...and before you know it all these girlfriends are saying nasty things about themselves...it's like our own little way of fitting in and joining the group...being part of the conversation...but it would have the same effect if the opposite is done...saying positive things about yourself and about others is contagious...
Think about it...the people we like to be around the most are positive people...and their positivity rubs off on us...when I'm having a bad day and then I hang out with one of my friends who is having a great day...my day tends to turn around...generally we are just hanging out laughing and that puts me in a good mood too...also sometimes when I hang out with my friends I end up feeling really good because I must have done something right to have friends like them...
So I want to encourage you to be positive and notice good things in yourself and others...I heard this speech one time where this guys catch phrase was "You ain't no cupcake"...what he meant by that was cupcakes crumble under pressure...whereas diamonds are created under pressure...so when you say "you ain't no cupcake" you are supposed to remember that you are being refined into something beautiful by the pressure...
Also I think maybe I should go eat a cupcake...
Also know that if I am not talking to you it's most likely not because I don't like you...it's more because I am a lot more shy than people think I am...so many people seem to think I am this great people person...but I'm not...I feel like I never know what to say to people...so I just let them talk...and I am not usually the type of person to introduce myself to someone new...I get really uncomfortable with that...
I know that sometimes on here I sound like I am great with words and shouldn't have a problem talking to anyone...but with my computer I can pretend I am typing up something that no one will ever read...and I don't have to see anyone's first reactions...I don't actually have to do any human interaction...and I have time to think about what I am going to say...and I do take my time...and use the delete button a lot...I like that...you can't really do that in a conversation...
Also I guess I don't really notice that I am part of any cool group or often that others think I am cool if they do...I think I am cool but I don't expect other people to think the same...cause I'm a bit quirky...and I can be a major jerk...and I can be super blunt...and I tend to make non-awkward situations awkward...it's one of my super powers...but I still like me...flaws and all...and I think that's what matters...that I like me and that Jesus looks at me and is like, "I did a good job on that one. She's who I made her to be."...I mean really I do what I want 99.9% of the time and don't really think at all about how other people will view me...that may be an exaggeration...I do think about what my friends think to a point...but you get what I'm saying...so when I hear through a friend or relative or even in person that people think I am cool...I'm kind of taken a back...
But it does sort of feel good to have other people think you are cool...but even if they didn't I would still be me...I guess you could say I'm self-assured...I know who and I am whose I am...and that's what matters...the rest is sprinkles on the cupcake (I could say icing on the cake but I don't really like icing...but I love sprinkles....and I don't really want my own whole cake...that's to much for me to eat...it will go bad before I can enjoy it...and yes I know it's not a real cake but I'm just being honest about who I am)...
Sure I still have days when I hate the way my hair looks (like right now...girl needs a haircut)...or days when I feel like I can't do anything right...but I figure it's just one day...not my whole life...my hair is going to look different tomorrow...and my mood is going to be different tomorrow helping me to see all the things I am good at...I don't let the every now and then bad days dictate my life...
Even with the bad days I often wish I could teach others how to be self-assured...self-confidant...but I'm not really sure how to do that...I think it would help if I had a better idea of how I became this way...but just saying that I had to realize these things at a young age since death is always trying to get me to join him on date doesn't really help anyone else...and I often find that just spouting Bible verses at people doesn't work either...I can say that "we are fearfully and wonderfully made" or that "we were knit together in our mothers wombs" but that doesn't always connect with people...
I do know that it helps to surround yourself with positive people who will bring you up and not put you down...and who will do the same for themselves...I read one time that girls tend to get this really bad group mentality where they all bash themselves...we've all seen it happen too...one girl says she hates her legs and then another says she needs a flatter stomach cause she fat...and before you know it all these girlfriends are saying nasty things about themselves...it's like our own little way of fitting in and joining the group...being part of the conversation...but it would have the same effect if the opposite is done...saying positive things about yourself and about others is contagious...
Think about it...the people we like to be around the most are positive people...and their positivity rubs off on us...when I'm having a bad day and then I hang out with one of my friends who is having a great day...my day tends to turn around...generally we are just hanging out laughing and that puts me in a good mood too...also sometimes when I hang out with my friends I end up feeling really good because I must have done something right to have friends like them...
So I want to encourage you to be positive and notice good things in yourself and others...I heard this speech one time where this guys catch phrase was "You ain't no cupcake"...what he meant by that was cupcakes crumble under pressure...whereas diamonds are created under pressure...so when you say "you ain't no cupcake" you are supposed to remember that you are being refined into something beautiful by the pressure...
Also I think maybe I should go eat a cupcake...
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